A very popular book came out sometime back. The book is about ‘revolutionising’ sex. It has many secrets about men and women. The common fears, common mistakes, the difficulties either has during sex, how to enhance your sex lives, and many many more things. I felt very funny when I cam to one section of the book. Its said “10 most common mistakes made by men in a bedroom.” I felt very funny, because these are mistakes I am sure all, I repeat ALL of us have made constantly or at least once. I am not going to tell you about all 10 of them. I am being very selfish here, because I bought the book with my hard earned money and read it because I am interested in improving my sex life with my girl. Now you may have seen many Internet sites highlighting the 10 mistakes. But has any of them explained these mistakes to you, have they told you how to get over them and how to improvise? No. Because these are sites which don’t study the mistakes, they just found them given somewhere and they picked them up and placed them in front of you. So today I am going to EXPLAIN 2 out of the 10 most common mistakes made in bedroom by men. Once you read if you want to know more you can feel free to learn more about your own anatomies.
COMMON MISTAKES ARE AS FOLLOWS:-
ASKING HER WHAT TURNS HER ON.
Haven’t we all done that? Come on don’t you lie to yourself here. We have all made this mistake once or so many times while making love to our woman. The key here is you have to Learn how to communicate! Yes you have to know that women are complicated piece of art and they always go by ‘I want my man to KNOW how to communicate.’ All women say this to their friends or to themselves, that the true soul mate will always know how to communicate with her while making love. Communication is the most important thing in sex lives. So here we make our mistakes. We think ASKING the woman what she likes while loving is communicating with her so she is going to like it.
This is a false belief my friend so get your mind off it. Because 70% of the times you ASK women if they appreciate men asking them you will get an answer “Oh yes, sure we do!” Unfortunately this couldn’t have been more wrong, because you start even believing it. I am sure you have heard that women love a man LEADING on the dance floor? Well you will be shocked to know that women appreciate men LEADING EVEN ON BED. I am sure you would always want to know what she wants, what turns her on and so on apart from just the frequency of position changes. But many women, for the matter of fact find it very hard to tell what they want in bed. This is the case unless you get her to be completely comfortable with you and she feels 100% free to open up to you. According to a book I was reading, the author says “If you just ask her “What turns you on?” you might get a good answer. She might even like it
when you ask her. But there is a strong chance that, on some unconscious level, she will feel a
WEAKNESS in you and be disappointed. ” This author, by the way is a woman herself. So when that is coming from a woman herself, we ought to believe it. This means once the woman sees a certain kind of a weakness in you, she might not be that keen during the intimate encounter that will follow.
The fact lies that A WOMAN WANTS HER MAN TO KNOW WHAT SHE WANTS!
This is the cold truth my friends. Now this can seem very very harsh on you. This is the reason why you either need a STRONG EMOTIONAL bond with her or you need to get her to open herself entirely to you. How do you do that? Well you either break your mind over it, or you just read a book that will teach you. But now you surely know what to do. You know that you need to have a strong emotional bond with your woman and that you need her to herself tell you what she likes and what she dislikes. You know that you have to get her comfortable and you need her to be open with you in order for you to satisfy her. Once you are on the right track you will hear her begging you to do something she likes, she will ask for more and oh the experience will just get hotter and hotter.
NOT KNOWING HOW TO BE SEXUALLY ATTRACTIVE.
This does NOT mean that you are not an attractive man. You can be a very very handsome man with chiselled features. But your appearance sexually is different from you being handsome. A not so handsome man can also be a VERY VERY ATTRACTIVE MAN SEXUALLY. This is yet another cold truth. But most men believe they can’t control how attractive they look. Its a known fact also that every one likes sex better when they are attracted towards their partner.
Sexual arousal flows directly from sexual attraction. So now you know that no matter how attractive you are or you are not otherwise, you have to be most attractive to your woman in bed.
And what most men don’t realize or they don’t know is that how attractive they look in bed that they can control just TOO WELL. Now sexual attraction differs when it comes to a man and woman. There is a lot of difference. We men usually get attracted by the outward appearance of the woman we are with. Something like her breasts, or how pretty her face looks, or curves. Its a known truth that we just need only that to get us attracted to her. But as I have mentioned earlier, a woman is a complicated piece of art. She will not get sexually attracted just my the way you LOOK.
So if its not how you LOOK, then what does a woman mean when she tells a man he is SEXY?
Well obviously here she is not talking about the way you look. A lot of women find Vin Diesel SEXY even though he is not as good looking as Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt. Why is that? Because clearly SEXY is far more to a woman than just a pretty face. Haven’t you ever thought about why really VERY beautiful women usually find an average or below average looking man? I have and I am sure many of other men have also given it a thought not just once but many a times. Frankly I have always thought that Beyonce is a very very pretty woman, but Jay Z? Ah no I don’t think he is a pretty boy. And if you think it is only because these average looking men have a lot of money, then its FALSE! That is so not true. The secret is that that average looking man has a certain sexual attraction than attracts the beautiful woman to him like iron to a magnet. I will tell you why money is not the reason behind the beautiful woman being with a not so good looking but rich man. See they are many many rich men. All DO NOT have beautiful wives. THEY DON’T. So if you think its just the money please do the research and you will know it is just a MYTH that its only money.
Now if its not the LOOKS and its not the MONEY, what does SEXY mean for a WOMAN?
Are you pulling your hair out now thinking what does it actually mean for a woman?
ANSWER: SEXY = A MAN WITH CONFIDENCE + PASSION.
This is a simple yet complicated equation in a woman’s mind and persona that she will find CONFIDENCE with PASSION as SEXY and not LOOKS and MONEY.
Now we have seen many men talking about their confidence, but there is a vast difference between confidence and SEXUAL CONFIDENCE. We hear very few men talking about their SEXUAL CONFIDENCE and even fewer talking about PASSION. And the most unfortunate fact is that most men are embarrassed by their own passion. Its a great shame because women are mover deeply by men’s passion and not just moderately.
The funny thing I read was that MOST men DO feel deeply about things. That means they ARE passionate on the inside. They are just too timid and fearful of humiliation to realize their own passion. Its takes massive CONFIDENCE to be able to display your PASSION. So in short, you can take it as that PASSION is just another form of confidence.
For women, men who can freely display these qualities of confidence and passion are a huge TURN ON in bed. Women feel greatly attracted to a confident man and feel more free to open up completely with them in bed. This in turn allows them to feel more sexually aroused. And this in turn is also a good news for us men. This is because unlike LOOKS and MONEY, which you can’t really do much to change, it is easier to learn a few simple things to dramatically increase the way a woman perceives your level of confidence and passion. Learning how to display them and send the ‘right signals’ is most essential.